That Transition thing..........

the summer blues are setting in. its hot in the mountains with not much to do.
Phoenix is growing and learning faster and faster. he can write his name. he calls it drawing his name. he can also draw his letters and numbers. its strange ,i can tell he imagines how to draw his letters in his head, as Phoenix thinks and puts thought to paper.
every weekend our neighbor has her grandchildren over. there's about four Typicals.
They always Invite Phoenix over to Play. Phoenix just runs away, and could care less about those children. I just try to smile as they ask Phoenix to come over.
its hard to handle but, I overheard the Children talking about Phoenix. One of the children said to the Other. " Phoenix DONT LEARN RIGHT!"
its crushing.. its things i dont understand. my son can do things typical children can not.
Maybe he does learn right but differently, and his memory is that of an elephant. he never forgets anything, except, he does forget how to use his words. and that would be the only thing, most of the time i believe he chooses not to use his words on purpose.

I know i am not the only parent of an autistic child that has felt this way. Yes, its clearly obvious my son is different than yours. he is nothing like your typical four year old.
as of late, transitioning from one task to the other as been dreadful. me and Phoenix's dad took him on a vacation to a waterpark. and Phoenix Loved it. he didnt understand when we left one pool, that there would be quickly another pool to visit. Phoenix would have a FULL on MeltDOWN when he left each Pool. He could not wrap his head around the transitioning from Ride to Ride ,Pool to Pool. I am sure people thought Phoenix was the biggest brat in the entire world. and at that moment i did do. my entire Body ached from head to toe, trying to pick him up or drag him around. I am sure Parents of autism understand when the kid becomes a limp noodle, and will not walk. I dont know how other parents handle this situation. all i know, is to bend down and pick Phoenix up kicking and screaming. and I calmly tell him we are going to another pool. oh, We all had the best time, but when Phoenix arrived at the next pool, he was happy again.
i do feel like I am on my own alot. its pretty lonely , most people have never been in the presence of autism. and they just do not understand. my family does not understand autism, simply because they are not around Phoenix enough to get to know him.
Transition is hard. Some parents use pictures for transition, but thats just to much for everyday situations. Phoenix's speech therapist recommended a timer with a beeper, to signal when its time to transition to something else. it works during speech therapy, we shall see

Simply Jedi..

I dont know about this. i still dont know how or why.
Phoenix and I were going shopping. he was in the cart being quiet for once.
we were shopping row by row. Down the juice isle we go. i needed some mix in energy drinks so, i am browsing for my favorite flavors, and i am rather close to the to boxes of mix ins.
the isle beside us had marshmallows, which are Phoenix's favorite. I think because marshmallows are mushy and Phoenix's sensory fingers love rolling the them between his fingers.
anyway, I grab my energy mix ins and look back at my child, and he has a bag of marshmallows in his hands. i could not believe it. but quickly as i begin to wonder how in the world Phoenix managed to get the marshmallows in his hands, a lady and her cart came behind me and i had to get out of her way. and the marshmallows left my mind as i needed to get out of walmart's crazy first of the month shopping day.
i began to wonder more and more about how phoenix got the marshmallows in his hands. i went back to walmart to see how the marshmallows were arranged in the isle. and low and behold the marshmallows were on the bottom 2 shelves. phoenix was in the cart, it was impossible for him to reach them.
I dont know how it happened. i will never know how he got the marshmallows in his hands. scenario after scenario has played in mind. but none make sense.
Phoenix, simply Jedi...........

the Crystal Seeker

Phoenix is off to camp this week. and he has been having a blast. everyday there is painting and swimming for ages 3-18. All these children at camp have certain disabilities. everything from autism to down syndrome. what i have realized through all my four years of parenting My crystal Baby is that I have been Placed in My Life to seek Crystals. WOW, i must say. I just had another Crystal Child appear to me.
yesterday, i was dropping off Phoenix at camp. along with other parents. and One of the Parents Just asked me, So, What's his Diagnoses? I just turn Around and look at the Parent, "Autism Spectrum Disorder" the Parent was Like Really. then the Parent looks at the lady beside me and Says " i think Your Daughter has Autism."
I think to Myself ... WHOA! Daughter + Autism = a Girl Child with Autism.. hmmm,
I asked the Mother of the Girl.. "can She Talk?" the mother said "Yes"
i looked at her and Said " that's Asperger's Syndrome!"

as the children were waiting in the Van this morning
something told me to start asking Questions about this little girl.
I could not help myself, I was being sucked in by this little girl.
How old is she? how many siblings?
then her mother started telling me everything i needed to know...
she even mentioned she needs to go outside and take long walks..

the girl is twelve is years old meaning She would have to be the Very First of the Crystals to arrive . the year would be 1999 Usually you would think at this Age you would have an Indigo/Crystal combo on your hands. Her energy Lacked the Cutting Energy of an Indigo. I have two Older Indigo Sons and I am very familiar with that Cutting Strike you Down Energy.

this Crystal Girl, Has Huge Black EYES. her eyes look like mirrors. when she looks into your eyes she steals your heart and grabs onto your Soul. She Placed her hand on the Van Window and said to her Mother " Mommy Mommy I love you!" it brought tears to my eyes.

I feel like i just found My favorite baseball player in a pack of baseball cards. its a spiritual RUSH,
to find Crystal child.. But,,, A GIRL!!!!

Which Brings me to wonder today. Its pretty rare to Find an Autistic girl even with Aspergers Syndrome. at least for cities i have moved too. and i will move again.... and again
i think that there is High Possibilities of these Girl Children Diagnosed with Autism being actual Crystal Children.

a Free Lunch

i received a notice in Phoenix's Book Bag. it Said "FREE Breakfast Free Lunch" i was thinking What in the Hell? i couldnt believe it!! the school Cafeteria is staying Open All Summer So the Children can Eat. the children do have to find transportation to get to the Cafeteria to Eat.
Summer after Summer, i have struggled to find Phoenix something to do, and find Typical Children for him to be around. Day after day i went to the Park, and there would not be anyone there.
here's a chance for Phoenix to be around Typical children in a Social Situation. Lunch time.
I would feel so strange showing Up for the Free Lunch! but i wouldnt be showing Up for a Free Lunch. I would be showing UP with Phoenix to be around Typicals. God, i would feel Shameful, As i have a refrigerator Full of Food, and a drawer full of Ramen noodles. Phoenix's favorite. I only give him half the seasoning packet, its full of yucky sodium.
its one Hell of a thought.
I dont know if i have it in me to show UP with my son..
A free Social Situation.

Cold Spots in my House

my house has been driving me crazy lately. maybe just too much time in the home.
there have been more and more Occurrences of Cold Spots in this house. as usual, i dismiss them everyday, but this morning, the Cold Spots Sent me into Chills and my hair stood up. I thought to myself "what the Hell" this is becoming a problem ,this house must be a ghost's playground.
you probably think of this as outside the normal. But, Every One, Including yourself, have experienced something ParaNormal. From normal people claiming to have seen a UFO, to ghost encounters. something strange has happened in your Life. think about it, maybe, you Dismissed IT just like I have, Over and Over.
god, help me at the things I have seen over my life time. unbelievable things have happened, right before my eyes and I loved it. When i was a Young Witch i used to believe I could do Anything With Great Confidence.
I used to believe I Could Rule the World.. Spiritually I walked with Gods. When you Do that and get to that level spiritually, you just continue to walk. some people feel that Divinity with Good Ole Jesus. most people are familiar with Jesus. i bet Jesus is Thanked over one million times a DAY!
THANK YA JESUS!
i wish jesus would come get these ghost out of my house. they are beginning to bother me.
back in the day, i could call a team to get them out. but i am so far away from that life NOW.
I am On MY OWN, everyday. and i am okay with that.
i need to focus on Why the Ghosts continue to want their presence known.
from Cold Spots, to faucets turning On, door knobs turning, its happening here.

that TWIN Flame thing..........

today is the last day of school for the little Phoenix. i cant believe another school year has Come and Gone. that's mere madness, how time just speeds up Faster and Faster as we Grow Older. when i was young time would drag and drag.... but know more. i dont know why, but i am a nervous wreck the last day of school. my sweet second son will be a senior in a matter of hours. maybe that's why i feel so, weird. I could start an entire other Blog on him entitled "the Indigo Teenager!" shew, that kid aint even playing around with his life. he is full throttle in his high school, and i dont push him at all. he is simply Self Driven in a Powerful way. i pray that will carry on into his work ethic.
Phoenix hasnt had much time with his daddy lately. his daddy works and works. and when his daddy his home and has to leave for work Phoenix's heart his crushed and he cries forever... as i have mentioned before Phoenix's lungs are Atomic. shew, my ears ring often...
one day this Past week my husband called me to meet him for dinner because he was working late. when we were leaving and Phoenix did not get to ride in Daddy's truck, he was crushed, and he cried and cried all the way home. i had to open a bottle of bubbles for him and he was okay again.
what i am noticing more and more, is his need of both Parents. maybe, it is the balance. but, i have never seen a child need both of their Parents like he does. my first son, was a daddy's boy, my second son, a mama's boy. and this Son. he needs both of Us. would you think that to be Autism, or his Crystal nature?
Sometimes, in your life you have those, oh, Memories?......
my memory took me back to a Beltaine years ago. Beltaine was my Holiday! anyway,I had just crowned a New May Queen.... So, energy was a GO GO.... into the night me and my husband were
standing next to each other, and this Powerful Third Degree witch came up to us along side my mother. and this witch said ... " OMG YOU are TWIN FLAMES! " i can remember the look in his eyes. yes, the witch was guy. i have met a handful of guy witches. and they were all some of the most Powerful witches i have ever encountered.
I had always knew there something different about me and my husband's relationship. it was a whirlwind courtship. we married after knowing each other for two months. its worked out.
maybe, just maybe Phoenix loves to be wrapped up into that flame. he loves to sit between us and put our faces together to kiss. its so cute.
i have read about Crystal Children being born to loving parents. In Phoenix's Case he is Born out of a flame.....
Twin Flames, soul Mates , Twin Souls, do exist.............

that Rare Unicorn

the coming of the New Age is Here. i think to myself.. (which i do a lot because i am stuck deep in the mountains)
I went on a field trip with Phoenix's Early Child hood class Last week. the class is filled with seven typicals and eight with developmental delays. Out of fifteen children, I found two crystal children this year. Phoenix and the other Child, both diagnosed with Autism. I have read that Autism Spectrum disorder is so broad. Each child,completely different from sitting in the corner rocking and spinning, with zero words to complete genius that needs to learn to talk.
while on the Field Trip i finally got to observe the two crystal children together. and let me tell you, these two Autistic Crystal children were talking to each other, but in their own gibberish language. the very same language gibberish Phoenix uses at home, but then i remind him to "use his words" it was an amazing experience. i asked his teacher if this was a common occurrence between the two, and she said usually when the two are Outside on the playground. hmmm?? Now, i want to tell you about the similarities of these two Autistic Crystal Children..
from talking to Phoenix's teacher about the two children. Both of these children have incredible memory. Both knew their letters and numbers by age two. Both Know their shapes. and Both are beginning to sound out the letters. and are clearly on the Path to reading. and finally both are four years old and will be five in the year 2012. of course in many ways they are different.
Phoenix's Sensory issues are off the Chart. he constantly needs to ground himself. he grounds himself by taking his socks and shoes off and Phoenix's beloved Fluffy..... but, as far as their Educational Mind and their ability to learn are at the same incredible rate.
i want you to think about how a parent should feel, think about your child at two years old that barely spoke a word. but in one moment in a toy store, you child jumps from his stroller to get to a bucket that held wooden letters. he would pick different letters up at random and used his voice to share the alphabet with you. wouldnt you be very Confused?
I had a hard time figuring out in Speech therapy separating Phoenix's knowledge and Phoenix's ability to communicate or Talk. I just could not wrap my mind around it. it made zero sense to me.
at times i search the internet searching for Crystal Children stories. i have found a couple of forums and groups here and there. but, as soon as i read that the Alleged young Crystal Child Can Talk and can talk in full sentences , i quickly click to another story. and then to another and another. There is no suffering there. that child can talk. Autism did not become your child's LABEL and you believe you have a Crystal Child. that child would be rare to encounter, like a Unicorn. but i read Far more stories about talking Crystals. I want to read about Autistic Crystals. Now, these children are interesting. these Crystal Children can command in the Spiritual World. not even on purpose, not even with words, just their mere presence.
there is also Autistic children that are NOT Crystals. those exists too.
with ALL Due Respect to my Readers, If you believe you have a Crystal Child that can talk. you have that Rare unicorn.
with phoenix it is like he has trouble forming his words. he tries and it comes out close, he really has to work Hard at saying the word Lemonade. he tries and tries.
i bet Phoenix thinks to himself, I don't speak your Language..............