baby steps Big Steps

part 1
my heart and soul feels like its getting stomped on right now. the seasons are changing to the dark time of year. and its hurts me physically, emotionally and most of all spiritually. but spiritually speaking its not that spiritual side of me, that shiney glitter glow of spring that radiates from me.. again here comes the dark. the dark side of my spiritual being, the sadness that comes with death of summer. Fall.
I live in the valley of the mountains. right in the middle. the lowest point in the area that i live. so, i watch the slow death of summer right before my eyes with the changing of the leaves.
i believe a lot has happened since the last time i stopped by here in my little piece of the Internet.
Phoenix, which he is the reason you landed on this page.
I learned something new about Phoenix's sensory issues, something i never imagined for the life of me.
Let me begin with saying, Phoenix one day started covering his ears when something he heard bothered him. it took me a long month for the reason to come to me. I am sorry sometimes i just dont get it. but never mind that.
i knew Phoenix has sensory issues. but i did not know what to expect with sensory issues. he plays with his fluffy and rubs it between his finger. His skin is super sensitive. i thought that was apart of his sensory too. he constantly has dry skin, especially now with the seasons changing. his skin has dry patches. right now its his legs, last week its was down his side. he is on a hydocortizone of 2.5 for his skin. He never acts like his dry skin bothers him. I realized not to let him take a bath, only showers, i dont want him sitting in water.
For about a week. different sounds or pitch would cause Phoenix to cover his ears and he would scream out in pain. one after noon his early childhood teacher mentioned Phoenix covering his ears, and panicking when they would be headed to music class. even certain voices from tv causes him to cover his ears. I didnt realize it, but Phoenix's sensory was heighten or elevated.
other people might call this sensory overload.
i started looking on the Internet about autism and sensory issues.and i ran across Sensory Hypersensitivity and Hyposensitivity.
http://www.suite101.com/article.cfm/autism_world/96543
after reading the article.
i realized Phoenix has Hypersensitivity.
the first is Hypervision.
i dont know how many times i have asked Phoenix, "how in the world did you see that?" or "how in the world did you find that?" When he was 6 months old, me and his dad took him to a company christmas party at his boss' house. I remember him playing on the floor and one of the guest commented on Phoenix picking up tiny pieces of lint off the carpet. it is reported on the above article, with hypervision you see particles flying the air. this is usually like rainbow colors floating in the air. But in a Crystal Children point of view here i would like to add , these particles could be of the veil between our world and the spiritual realm. Hypervision
which as children me and baby sister would love to watch the flying colors in our room at night. its a family thing.

Hyperhearing
Phoenix has demonstrated hyperhearing throughout his life.
When i took him to his brother's concert, the drums, which he loves drums. but not this drum, when the kid started playing the big round drum, Phoenix went crazy. He started screaming out in fear. it was something awful. i left the concert quickly, i took Phoenix outside and he could not calm down his fear. it was so bad, 7 months later, when we drop off his brother at school now, Phoenix just starts crying thinking he is going back to the concert.
part2

i left this post for a couple of days.
me and Phoenix's dad have decided to go private for phoenix's speech therapy. i knew it would be very expensive. i prepared myself for $90 maybe $100 per hour. but, i received shocking quote from the therapist. $150 per hour. i felt like i had been punched in the stomach. no wonder parents with austic children are going bankrupt. of course, insurance coverage of autism is just tragic. tragic , i say. we keep getting told NO. insurance will not cover our austic child's therapy. i read out of desperation, parents telling their doctor that they child fell and hit their head, and now, the child cant talk, just to get the insurance to cover the child's speech therapy. it is so sad.
either these children get help now, the earlier the better. or when our autistic children grow up, where will they wind up? what will happen. with the constant diagnosis of autism 1-88 boys right now. in 20 years where will these millions of these children go, fit in. NOW, is the time to act. but, i believe where i live, our insurance coverage for autism keeps getting voting it down. does no one in our congress have austic children?
another thing that bothered me. our insurance company through my husband work. I cant call them out on this. But damn, beginning 2011 the company my husband works for, UH! they are beginning to cover Same Sex couples on their insurance policy. i am 100% for this jump forward in todays world. but what about my son and the other autistic children. they will cover same sex couples because it is the politically correct thing to do. mean while, Autism is left out in the cold again.
i am going to do the best thing i can do. we will wind up paying for our child's therapy. it is worth every cent.
Phoenix's teacher said he probably will not make it into JK or kindergarten. only because of his social skills. funny, but this state requires a kindergarten entrance exam. if you fail, you go to JK. just the other day i met a child who is six years old, but he is in JK. CRAZY ass state i live in. Phoenix would pass the entrance exam right now, to enter kindergarten. but he is lacking social skills. I cant help that my son has no desire to play with the other kids. he is working on it. he is still taking baby steps. Phoenix is finally dancing to music, its a wonderful thing, that's a big step.
i have a meeting today about Phoenix's speech today. i have to fill out paper work, and all that that goes along with that. i am happy and disgusted all that same time.
i am going to do the best i can do.